7 Days
….and what is it to you?
Gratitude seems like a pretty simple concept:
it’s all about giving thanks, right?
Yes, but Dr. Robert Emmons, one of the world’s most well-regarded experts on all things gratitude, says that: “Gratitude defies easy classification. It has been conceptualized as an emotion, an attitude, a moral virtue, a habit, a personality trait, or a coping response.”
For our purposes in the Gratitude Buddies journey, we will focus on four aspects of gratitude:
cognitive: thinking about and writing down a gratitude list
emotional: the emotion of gratitude can arise spontaneously, but being intentional about cultivating it, such as through journaling or meditation, makes it more natural in our lives
action-oriented: we are taking the time to notice, write and share; some days we will also focus on the act of expressing thanks to others
habit or discipline: we are turning gratitude into a habit and committing to it even during challenging days. At some point, if we keep it up, we may begin to feel like being grateful has become a personality trait.
A few other noteworthy points about gratitude:
Like meditation, gratitude is now very well-researched. There are now more than 2700 studies on PubMed exploring the impacts of gratitude.
The research generally associates gratitude with a wide range of benefits related to physical and mental health, including better sleep, more exercise, less anxiety and depression, less suicidal ideation, better relationships, and more.
Understandings of gratitude can vary across cultures.
There are many wonderful resources out there dedicated to gratitude, including websites, books, journals and more.
It’s also important to read what “gratitude” is NOT - to help us avoid extra frustration (see Below).
Will gratitude solve all my problems?
Well, no, of course not. But then, yes, in a way, it might! From a mindfulness perspective, we seek to live our lives in moments. Not years, months, days, or even hours. If you’ve ever had a moment where you feel awakened or even overtaken by love or gratitude - and this does happen to me and particularly in meditation - it feels like for a moment our problems have actually dissolved. It’s as if, for that moment, we’ve stepped into another dimension. This is why I recommend practicing with meditation: because at some point I think we can all get there. Yes, we come back to the “real world”, but often with a different perspective.
For Reflection: for some people having a gratitude practice is about the health benefits; for others it’s becoming more positive and for others, there is a spiritual dimension. What does gratitude mean to you? Why is this practice important to you or what do you hope to gain from it?
What gratitude is NOT
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All emotions are a healthy part of being human; having a gratitude practice doesn’t mean shutting yourself or your loved ones down
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If you have a major problem in your life, you’re probably going to have to deal with it at some point; while we can choose to appreciate what shows up in our lives, and what it’s meant to teach us, that won’t necessarily make problems go away
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Gratitude is not saying: even though my boss is a tyrant, I should keep my mouth shut and be grateful; nor is it about accepting an unjust status quo. It is, however, asking for a broader perspective and wiser action.
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A gratitude practice is a tool in the toolbox. There are many others: expressive journaling, good nutrition, meditation, mindful walking, yoga, breathing, therapy, exercise, etc
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Meditation options:
1) A 3 Minute Meditation on What Is Gratitude To You - you may wish to practice before you send your message so you can share your reflections.
2) An 8 minute general gratitude meditation with music
OR
If you are short on time, this 3 breath practice can be done after you write your list:
With eyes closed or lowered gaze
Inhale for 5 counts
Hold for 5 counts
On the exhale, call to mind the 1st item on your list.
Repeat with the second and third items
You can also try to add a smile or hand on chest to this practice
Gratitude Message for your Buddy
After writing, scroll down to the GREEN button: ‘SEND TODAY’S MESSAGE.’
DO NOT click on the PINK button at the bottom right or you will lose what you have written.
Optional prompt
Day 2: Meaning of Gratitude
Today you’re invited to reflect what gratitude means to you.